I wanted to share with you a few of the events that have touched my soul of late. You know from my brother’s writings that after I was freed from Syrus and his sister over a year ago – that I have vowed to take his life. My son has made this pledge as well. But Merneptah is my life’s soul and I will never allow Syrus to confront my child alone in a fight. The Oldest of the Old Ones will not come alone. Syrus knows that our blade skills match….so he will not enter this fight single-handed. His son Pasha, who haunts my son since his birth, will join us in the desert meeting place of Old Memphis. Even if it means my life, I will destroy both before my son joins this fight. I decided to train my blades in the old ways.
Leaving the Chosen One Saul in my brother’s care…I started out alone from the palace heading fast across the desert for my childhood caves. The things that happened along the way will change the outcomes and I wanted to take these moments to share my thoughts with you. So I sit now listening to my feelings and the beat of my heart.
My spirit becomes strong when in the old great caves. My mind clears in preparation for the coming blows. Normally I train alone but this time an unwanted gift greeted me amongst the dunes. My lifelong friend and fellow warrior took upon herself to present me with a beautiful male caregiver. He is Offspring of the oldest human tribes….but no Protectress has ever suffered a male caregiver. Only the females of the old tribal families have come to me as Caregivers. As you will recall from my brother’s books, my Caregiver and sister Inanna’s life was taken in a battle that ended in my captivity. For almost a year, I languished in the monster Syrus’ palace. But let me tell you of this, riding hard for the caves, I stopped in the desert to visit with Inanna’s families and was greeted with this offering.
Hidden and waiting was a male warrior of uncommon strength. Shortly after being greeted by the families, Hadid presented himself. The next morning I resumed my journey to the caves with this new unknown male fighter at my side. As soon as we arrived in the training caverns, we stripped from our desert robes and prepared to test blades. I wanted to experience for myself the power of this male before accepting him into my life.
I had every intention of wear this young one down. I wanted proof that he would survive the battles I knew lie ahead. Understand dear reader that I have no illusions that I will survive the coming months. I only needed to know that this young warrior would thrive in the fight and guard my children should I fall under Syrus’ blade.
The training fight with the young one Hadid wore on for hours…surprising me. The languid movements of his long limbs attested to a lifetime of training under Arsay. His every motion echoed her battle skills. It allowed me the luxury of anticipating his moves while prompting his frustrations. The strain of controlling the pain and fatigue etched his beautiful face. Sweat streamed from the tightly coiled black mass that plastered the chiseled cheeks. As the fight wore on, I moved in closer knowing that he could no longer follow the rapid flashes of my blade, he was responding through pure instinct. Grunting with each parry, I knew that Hadid’s legs would shortly give way. Each breath escaping his lungs blew across my face. Both bodies coated in a wet sheen soaked the fabric covering our loins. The sweet nectar of his arousal met my nostrils and my body quickened. However, I am his Protectress and from birth, he was prepared for this moment.
If I ignored the ancient tradition of only accepting a female at my side as Caregiver – then he would begin his long journey with me, the lone companion of the tribal Protectress. If I reject him, the journey back to Dubai and Arsay would be painful.
At last, his chest heaved and I saw the rapid pulsing of his heart. Hadid had reached beyond his limits. Covered in blood and sweat he was near dehydration. A full half day had passed since we began the training. I had to stop him and delivered my final blow meant to stun not hurt. He landed hard on the sandy cave floor and I inhaled deeply….satisfied. This young one would be the first male to become caregiver to a Protectress.
Hadid immediately stood to face me. The look in his eyes warmed my heart. The brown eyes staring at me were soft with love, admiration, and brimming with tears. The full lips quivering in an effort to control his emotions…Hadid’s realization came that he is the new Caregiver to his Protectress.
I bellowed, “Arsay has done well. You will be my caregiver. But understand that in battle when I command that you stand down…heed me.” He has second sight and knows that the coming fight with Syrus will cost us. I wanted Hadid to survive.
Drawing closer he said, “Meretneith you are my life. I will always do as you ask. It is time for your bath.”
His voice carried the same arrogance as when I first met him. Yet I heard the emotion hidden just below the surface. Stripping my wet loincloth as I walked away, the superb competition caused a need to grow between my thighs. I knew that the scent of my arousal and the need to be pleasured hung in the air between us. Nevertheless, Hadid understood what all males of my kind know. Although my arousal in battle is known it is a dangerous time to be near me – an unwanted touch or embrace could mean death. In these times, I long for the touch of my males – Ptah and Saul.
Entering my sleeping chambers, I stretched out on the bed awaiting my bath. I could smell the heat of the steamy water carrying the scents of healing herbs. Touching the smoothness of my wet skin, my thoughts dwelled on Saul and Ptah. I touched those spaces where my spirit remembers the angry blows of my enemies. My soul recalls past battles and the love that followed.
Syrus’ fighting skills are my match and in these moments dear reader, I am not sure I will survive this coming blade fight and I can tell you that feel fear. Fear that I will not survive to be with my love ones again.
I wonder, as always before a major battle, if I will endure. Death is an inevitable passage to another lifetime in accordance to the Law of the Ma’at. This existence has been lonely and harsh. Yet I yearn for just a little more time with my love ones before I go to the light. I fear that the price to purchase those precious moments will be dear.
My brother has shared in his book the fact that I have found love in the Chosen One; a love that I have never known. I want to live to enjoy that new found treasure as well. I want to see the arrival of my grandchildren and to see my daughter Asherah grow to maturity.
Dozing…I hear Hadid bring the copper tub to my chambers and begin to fill it with hot fragrant herbal water. I asked him to leave me. He knows he will be pushed to his limits more than once before we journey to Old Memphis and the fight that waits. Impatient…I wanted to be left alone with my thoughts and comforting memories.
The cooled desert air has entered to search the cathedral ceilings before blowing gently over my body. It soothes my feverish yearnings. Stretching my aching body out on the sleeping cushions, I put my device away and recall Saul’s lips before succumbing to sleep.
‘Til the next time….